Michelle Duggar Saps My Brain

Admittedly, I'm no expert in large families.  I have a sister and two brothers, a fairly normal sized group for my era.  I personally birthed three of my own.   So the number of children I consider acceptable is vastly different from the Queen of All Things Uterine and Fallopian,  Michelle Duggar.

I bow to her reproductive system.  And scoff and sneer and rage against the machine.

Why?  Simply, why?  I get the whole 'we have the children God sends us' litany - I don't buy it because I know where babies come from.  And how to prevent them from coming.

God also sent you a damned brain.  Come out of that Stepford bubble for a minute and face facts: 

You. Have. Nineteen. Kids. 

You and that shellac-headed moron you married.  And you gave them stupid names for the most part.  Ginger with a 'J' just to continue your prejudice against the other 25 letters of the alphabet?  C'mon.

I watch this show - actually I stop while surfing when I see it on - just as I watch boxing while flipping channels - amazed that anyone would do either.  I think I'd get into a ring with Joe Frazier before I would become a baby-making menace.

You can't parent nineteen children.  It is emotionally and physically impossible.  One episode had TQATUF sharing her parenting tips.  Each child is evidently given a 'buddy.'  (Translated - one of the older children is given a toddler as soon as it's weaned so that Michelle can continue her ongoing mission to birth a nation.)  She did say that each new baby was her buddy at first.

Wow - you mean each new baby gets your undivided attention for awhile?  Sorry, don't believe it.  Having three kids divides your attention - a passel just sends it off the charts.

I realize that the Duggars were doing their imitation of rabbits long before they began whoring their family out for television.  I do wonder how many more they would have had if TLC hadn't knocked on their door.

Their last baby was born monstrously premature.  This poor child faces a lifetime of physical problems.  And why?  'Cause Mommy and Daddy are irresponsible.  They sold out, and honestly, who can blame them - somebody's got to feed all their little 'buddies.' 

I could understand this disaster easier if I thought they were doing all the birthing for religious reasons.  If Dumbass Dad was a minister of some weird sect and saw this as a way to truth and enlightenment.

But they're used car salesmen.  Does that species really need advanced?

I know that the number of children other people feel they can have is not my business.  The children seem very well-adjusted and happy.  They aren't asking that I help support them and they're home schooled so tax dollars aren't even going to educate them.  The Duggars evidently pull their own weight.

My hope is that each of the nineteen children lead purposeful and meaningful lives. 

And that one day Michelle wipes the adoring, blank gaze off her face, gets a prescription for birth control, and tells Jim Bob to blow beets.

Amen.